This is Jackie, Houston, Addyson, and Hudson :)
We did extended family pictures too - but, I thought I would share those in a separate post.
Here is a sneak peak of the Cline Family pictures - What a beautiful family! :)
Addyson was very cooperative - and gave terrific smiles!....
...Hudson was on-the-go! I had to chase him, literally - but, we got 'em! ;)
This is baby Adalyn! 11 weeks old.
She is so precious! I was searching for the belly blog of her mama and their family, and I realized - I didn't do one! So, now I will have to do a back dated post of her beautiful belly session. Until then, here she is, perfect baby Adalyn!
The past 5 years have represented many changes in my life. And, as life should have it, I know 2013 will be filled with many more. Some that we can plan for, and some that we can't. But, I am really looking forward to 2013.
Just over a year ago - I started this photography journey. It has been a excellent way for me to develop a different side of myself. And with that, I stumbled into this writing that is turned into my own type of therapy. I love writing. I love sharing the challenges of parenting and living, and rejoicing in all of the everyday blessings that are so powerful. It is the little things that make life worth living - they are why we do what we do. We love and connect with people - our friends, families, strangers. We share joy and sorrow - we empathize, together. That is what makes us human. I want to celebrate more of those connections.
photo credit Chris Bland
This year, in the quickly approaching 2013, my focus is connecting. I love the connection I have found from the past that has come to bless me this year, and every upcoming year for the rest of my life. This is developing through my engagement and wedding planning... but most importantly, life planning. In my personal life, I get to share wedding planning and many, many more stories of my baby boy that is quickly turning into a little man.
I love the connections I have made with new families and clients and I look forward to the many more that I will meet and the continued experiences I will get to share with the clients that call me to capture their life. For Life, Love & Lemons Photography, I will be opening a studio! It isn't all mine - I am sharing it with a wonderful and ambitious young lady, Abby, that I happened to connect with through taking her family pictures. She is opening a baby boutique, Knee High to a Grasshopper - and I will be sharing some space with her. I am really looking forward to the expansion of my business and the many, many new faces I will meet along the way. Click on the logo to take you to her FB business page - like and share! ;)
I will be selling some of my painted furniture within her store as well. I am SO excited to be able to dedicate some time to this side of my creativity. I have 6 pieces I am working on now for the store... a few for sale and a few for display.
My website. I was ready for a face lift - so, I made a few changes to bring in the new year. My Gallery has finally been updated! It is great to say that I have been so busy that my gallery was not reflecting my most recent work. And, now it does. I still have some updating to do - but, I have started and feel proud to display all of my beautiful clients. Same layout, but different, yet kindof the same color scheme. And, the linen vintage fabric look is a great representation of another new avenue I am working into....
Vintage Rentals. I don't know what this scope is totally yet, but I have a lot of old stuff. And, I have an addiction to keep buying so - I thought I might as well rent it out! I will have different pieces that can be rented for events: Parties, Baby and Bridal Showers, Weddings, etc. A big investment I have been making is in China :) I have almost 250 complete table settings available for rent. This will include silverware and napkins, dinner plates and salad bowls, teacups and dessert plates. It is my newest love and addiction. I will be working to get my own rental gallery online for viewing and rental. The hard part is the name... I want it to be connected to my lemon theme but still have a name for itself... So, I will be kicking that around.
This busy wonderful life never ceases to amaze me. It is full of new exciting experiences, the planned and unplanned! The best part is - I know that wherever I (we, John, Brayden, and I) end up - we are exactly where we are suppose to be. There is always a plan that is bigger than our own, and I know there are great things in-store for us in 2013.
Bring on the new and meaningful connections of 2013! May you all have a happy and safe New Years Eve and New Years Day. God bless!
I survived Christmas.
I more than survived - I made the most of my first Christmas without Brayden. I enjoyed my first Christmas with John.
We woke early on Christmas - but laid around in the quiet. I was suddenly struck by horror - I had forgotten my camera at his Grandma's house... oh no! John being the wonderful man that he is, thought it was just important to have... not just blurry camera phone pictures - so, he went and got it, for us. I stayed in bed and sipped on my coffee.
It was different then the past 3 years - but, it was very pleasant. We made our own fun - silly. goofy. lazy. All before the running around began from one family to the next.
Here is a a glimpse of us more than surviving Christmas, but loving it.
John LOVES Kentucky Wildcats - I bought us tickets to go to a game - he bought me Kentucky shirts... not sure if they are really for me... or for him! (My Mom is a Duke fan and is NOT happy about this)!
I love clothes - John loves sports. Our gifts received from the other defiantly reflect this theme!
Our other little roommates enjoyed Christmas at home with us too! Jojo is just like a kid - she doesn't care about any real gifts - she is perfectly content with a box and tissue paper.
Brayden's Dad sent me a lot of pictures. Cookies for Santa. Food for the reindeer. Lots of gifts under the tree. He was beyond excited. Beyond happy. And, although my heart literally aches - I smile with tears because I know he is having so much fun - and, he is so loved. It doesn't always seem fair - but, he is happy and that is really all that matters.
Here he is at the end of his Virginia Christmas.... clearly he had no fun at all! ; )
I am still counting down... 3 more days...
I hope you all enjoyed a wonderful and safe holiday as well!
Everyone deserves a day or two to disappear. A day or two to sulk. A day or two to feel sorry for yourself. Life isn't always easy and at times it is hard to hold everything together. Life these days are busy and full - and that can be a great thing - but, sometimes it is overwhelming too. So, we should allow ourselves a small breakdown, and not feel bad about it. Then, we need to get back up, wipe away the tears, brush it off and charge on.
Last night after work, I walked in the door, dropped my bags, grabbed the cat and went directly up to bed. And there, I sat for 3 hours. Doing nothing. I had no more tears. I stared blankly at the TV and watched useless, yet very interesting shows. I like the history channel - I learned about JFK, the Bay of Pigs, the Cuban Missile Crisis, the Cold War, and the Berlin Wall. Many details that I embarrassingly enough to admit, knew very little about. I learned about JFK's contributions to our country and the world. I listened about the Bermuda Triangle and the theories of it's destruction. I watched a current day mummification - I thought that was cool (I am a science geek too).
The world continues to spin even through my breakdowns. So, at 9 o'clock I decided to shower and let it all go. And I did. Today is new.
Us on Wednesday - home sickI reflect on my mood and behavior yesterday and I fight with the anger the wells up. Having a split family is really hard. It is harder then I could have ever imagined. It is hard on both parents, from different angles - for different reasons. None of which I am going to go into details on here - if you live it, you already know - and if you don't, you are lucky. But, don't think I down play the efforts it takes to run a family unit, together. It is really hard. I commend all families of all types that do the day in and day out.
It is the every day things that we don't see. We loose touch with the significance and the beauty that is in a sleeping child, the laughter and love they show in the smallest way, and how quickly they learn and grow. Someday, they will be us. Us. Our actions. Our words. Our outlook. I pray that Brayden is different than me. I pray that he is better than me. I hope he exudes patience and optimism. I hope he gives his time and talent and never expects anything in return. But, in many ways, I pray he is just like me. I pray he finds a passion and follows it. I pray that he waits to find a perfect love. A love that is built on friendship and mutual respect. I hope he has determination in life and pushes to succeed, especially through the failures. Through the failing, you learn far more lessons then succeeding. Failing keeps you pushing. Keeps you driving. Keeps the hunger for success alive. If you always succeeded, what would you have left to do? I hope he invests in love and happiness. For him to do these things, I have to be the example. I have to invest in love and happiness. We all should.
I haven't written much about my ongoing relationship with God and Church. But, I am doing it - not perfect - but, I am better then I was a year ago. I assume a year from now, I will be better then I am now. A sermon the other Sunday still rings in my ears. Treat everyone as you want to be treated. Invest in loving and respecting others, and they too will invest in loving and respecting others. I am a work in progress. I was very rude to a customer service person the other day - it wasn't his fault my order was wrong. I have no excuse for being rude or impatient. I don't want Brayden to pick those traits up from me. I need to be better - little eyes are watching. He is always watching and learning from me. And, others do the same. Love, Respect, Happiness resounds with everyone - doing onto them, will do onto others.
So, as the new year approaches, I will begin my list. It's a great time to reflect on the person I want to be and the example Brayden deserves. Investing in love and happiness for him, for me, for everyone.
This is my cousin Michael and his fiance Kate. They were visiting this past week from Alaska. Mike is pilot there, and found a pretty adorable catch, Kate!
Welcome to the family Kate!
Here are a few of their pictures!
Congratulations on your engagement! :)
It started a few days ago - well, it actually started months ago. Dreading the Christmas holiday. How will I do it? How will I function? How will I celebrate this wonderful time of year when I feel absolute solitude? How do I not ruin this for John, for us? How do I make it be ok?
I was making plans with my family about Christmas Eve and Christmas Day... Me? No plans really. No cookies or milk to set out for Santa, no reindeer food for his helpers. I don't have any reason to wake up early. No rush out of bed. No child excitement for the visitor that filled the stockings and ate all the cookies. The only evidence of his visit are crumbs and gifts. Christmas morning will be quiet. Too quiet.
Today is bad. Brayden leaves tomorrow. Yesterday we were both home sick. It was nice to be together even though we didn't feel well. But, every time he acted out, and I got mad - I got extra mad at both of us. Why are you (he or me) ruining our last day together? Then, guilt today for not making more of yesterday. I am angry. I am sad. All I can do is cry.
We have an early trip to the airport. I get to drive them. I talk to Brayden about all of the Christmas excitement - flying on the airplane (he continues to call it a rocketship - and says he and Daddy are astronauts). We talk about Santa coming to Grammy's house and seeing his cousins. We talk about all of the fun he is going to have - and I say it with convincing enthusiasm. And, I am happy for him. I want him to have that time with his Dad and his Virginia family and friends. It is a HUGE part of his life. I am happy he has it. But, I still feel bad for me. I feel bad for us. I feel bad that he is split. And then, the knife to my heart when he says "Mommy is sad?" And, he does it with true hurt feelings and concern. I try my best not to cry. I fight the tears. Sometimes the tears win. I say "yes, Mommy will miss you, but you are going to have so much fun! I want you to have so much fun!"
I bought him one of those recordable Hallmark books. You know, the one you record while reading the book. The one I got is about why Rudolph is the most famous reindeer. I gave it to Brayden last night - I want him to take it with him. That way, we can still read books together even when we aren't together. We read it last night - 4 times. I added extra words at the end of the book. I say something like, "Merry Christmas Brayden! Mommy loves you and misses you so much!" Every time he heard that part, he would cry. And then, I would cry. Times 4.
Typically, I like to have ' the silver lining' when I write. It helps keep me positive. Today is not one of those days. I know there are plenty of 'silver linings' in this situation and in life in general. But, somedays - the silver linings don't mean anything. Somedays, it is the last thing you want to hear. Somedays, crying is needed. I pray for the end of the day, for bedtime. So I can sleep away the sadness. I will look for the silver lining tomorrow.
I babysat my sister's 3 kids the other night. 4 kids under 1 roof is much different than 1 kid. Brayden alone gets me frazzled. I kept thinking, "oh my gosh, I am going to pull my hair out." I waited for the chaos... but it never happened. Sure, there were a few fights over toys and few tears, but what is a good family night without the normal. To be honest, I really enjoyed it. They are all at such great ages - absolutely the most innocent, kind, caring, considerate little ones. It was really fun - and, I need to make a point to do it more often. They played, made cookies, bathed, watched movies - and laughed - a lot. And, I did too.
This was on Friday - I was still shaken from that days tragedy. So, it could have contributed to the realness of that night. I had Brayden and his cousins - and John (he's a teacher) all together. all safe. all happy.
Thank you God for this extraordinary everyday life. We are so blessed. Thank you for the laughter, and tears. The messy fingers and flour every where. Thank you for the the simplest joy of making dinosaur cookies; and memories. all together. all safe. all happy.
Mallory Jo Gudmunson Bland - better known to most of us as Mal Jo. She is one of my dearest friends, and I am lucky enough to have her as my sister. Over the past 3 years we have become a lot closer then we were the first 24 years of our life.
Mallory was the baby of the family for some time until the youngest two us surprised us. Mallory and I never got a long. I was hard on her. As siblings do, I was picked on by Nathan because I was younger, so naturally I took it out on her being my younger. Eventually we learned to cover for each other, and she would let me barrow her clothes and shoes but she had her friends and I had my own life too. Life unfolded for both of us. She met and married before I did. She had a home before I did. Our lives were just in different stages. Not one better then the other, just different.
But, we were both pregnant at the same time and got to share in the ups and downs of that experience together. Then, came newborns and breastfeeding and babies that became 1. These babies stumbled and fumbled on shaky legs and learned to walk and worked so hard to say their first words. We experienced those together. Side by side. Then came the terrible two's and the tantrums... and now our littles are both 3 (Maxine will be in a few months). We share in the the many frustrations they cause but rejoice more loudly and smile pridefully at each of their accomplishments and their innocence. Brayden and Maxine are just starting out. I can only imagine the mischief they will get into together. Mallory went on to have another little guy, Mason. I respect the patience it takes for her and Chris to make a marriage and family work. They find a balance in life. It is a journey I am just beginning (again) and they have been doing it successfully - through the trials and celebrations - they do it. I really admire both of them.
Mallory is the fashionista of the family - and a culinary artist. I am neither of those. Luckily, I have her to dress me and I frequent their house for her home cooking! She is a beautiful and kind young lady - who also is a wonderful mother, wife, aunt, daughter, and sister.
I am so glad we found friendship through being sisters and mothers. I honestly don't know what I would do without you. Thank you for all of your support :) We Love you! Happy Birthday!
This post is long over due.
Aubrey and Justin got married on October 6 and it marked the day of their marriage but also, a milestone for Life, Love & Lemons. It was officially, wedding #2. And, we defiantly chalked it up as a success!
Their ceremony was intimate and beautiful. Justin, was a childhood neighbor. And, he grew up with my brother. So, this wedding was special to me for many reasons. Being able to witness and capture their union was close to my heart. And, I have to admit - I did shed a tear or two during the ceremony. It was heartfelt and beautiful. The minister held up a string. She said " I tasked Justin and Aubrey to go home and tie this sting into a knot, together. At first the task seemed difficult. However, with communication and working together, the knot came together. Much like marriage. It is work, and sometimes hard but communicating and working together will provide a happy and successful marriage." It was very touching.
Here is a glimpse inside their beautiful and special day.
Today I am celebrating my bloggerversary.
It was actually about a month ago. But, today my web host is taking out my annual subscription fee... so, it was a pleasant reminder of how this all started, and where I am today :) I started thinking and planning this venture long before I actually started it. Years before. But, life takes over and somewhere, somehow the days come and go. All of the times I said "someday I will" kept passing me by.
I always wanted to do the photography. However, I didn't really know how bad until I started to dig into all of the beauty that is captured. Photography seems simple. Take a picture, edit, print. But, it is so much more. It is a vision. It is an art. It is an expense. It is time. Time away from family to pursue something that fills my heart. It is time researching and shopping and packing and unpacking a car. It is a garage and basement FULL of props. It is always working to be better. It is about taking 800 pictures to get just that perfect 1. There is always at least 1 perfect one. It is consoling children - and their parents. It is trying to sell a business - but really, it is my heart. It is guilt in selling something I love to do. I have so much to learn. But, I am learning every day. I love the world that families let me into. I am hired to capture moments that they will treasure forever. I love my job, my hobby, my passion :)
I didn't have a passion for a blog - never even considered it. My Mom actually mentioned it once... I thought she was nuts! Then as I researched, I realized most photographers had them. So, I came around to the idea. As I have mentioned in the past, I found several bloggers and I fell in love with their writing. The way they tell stories and share ideas. They would share their heart - out for the whole world to critique. I haven't come up on many critics. Thank goodness! I don't think my skin is thick enough for that. I am SO thankful no one has commented on all of my grammar and spelling errors. I was never very good at those! But, I love to write. The blog has evolved into much more then it was intended, and I love it. I realized through writing, I always felt like I had something to say. In my quiet moments, I would talk to myself, sometimes out loud - sometimes in my mind. But, I always have something to say :) This blog has helped me talk out some tough times. It has helped me to stay positive; stay focused. I read back a year from now and I love that I have a chronicle of my life. An evolution of who I was, where I am going, and who I am not yet. More importantly, I have captured Brayden's everyday life, his innocence, his charm, beauty and wit. It has given me the outlet to share my pride, my joy, My Boy. I will keep that forever. And oh how he has changed! So much can happen in a year.
A year from now, life will be different from where I sit today. I anticipate it will be very different. There will be many more posts about Brayden and how he is growing too fast. I will share lots of new client faces (God willing) and lots of repeat clients too (God willing). I will share my own wedding chaos... oops, I mean planning. And, who knows what else will come along the bend. :) Many more ups and downs of life. We will make plans for a future and I am sure there will be many detours that we wont see coming. That's life.
Thank you.
To all of those who have given me the opportunity to photograph your special moments. You gave me a chance when my portfolio was very small. I love that we have laughed together through difficult children, uncooperative weather, and pooping babies. Together, we smile pridefully at a beautiful moment captured - both sharing our hearts, yours of your family and mine of my work. And to everyone that has read along this crazy, extraordinary, everyday, wonderful life of mine - thank you for reading (especially through the grammatical errors). To everyone that has commented through the site or through facebook, I don't know that I could ever express how much your words mean to me. You take time out of your lives to read and comment. I appreciate it all.
On this bloggerversary I will have to do something special.... I may wait till spring (nice picture taking weather). Maybe do a "Re-Grand Opening" of Life, Love & Lemons :)
Thanks again! And, stay tuned! New updates to the site will be coming and some other surprises too!
A million thank you's - and many more to come!
xo ~Megan
Since I have moved back to Illinois, I have had to face a few obstacles, challenges, and changes. Well, not just 'I', but 'we'. Brayden and I have done this together. Outside of the everyday hustle and bustle I am typically a pretty optimistic person. However, I have been struggling more recently. Maybe it is just the holiday slump, or maybe it is just part of the peaks and valleys we go through in life.
Last Saturday I had a little break down. I had a self pity party that lasted the entire day. I have a problem letting things in my life overcome my mood. I don't think I could count the number of times I have spoiled joy for myself because I was too busy dreading something else that is out of my hands. Too many, I guarantee.
I always turn to my Mom. I find that to be a reoccuring theme in my life. My Mom always makes me feel better. She can't fix it (even though I am sure inside she wishes she could). I vent. I complain. I let it all out in one very long winded rant. I whisper so others in the house won't hear that I am falling apart. Mom just listens. She always just listens. And then, in the moment when I stop to catch my breath, she looks at me to be sure I am done, then she says, "This is just life, Megan. Being mad is habit. You have to just decide to let go and be happy."
I knew she was right. And throughout the rest of the day, I fluctuated between happy and mad. Happy when things were going right... and then when the littlest thing would happen, a tantrum from Brayden or misdirections to our destination would put me right back. On top of it, I would get mad at myself for ruining a perfectly beautiful day. You see, Brayden will be leaving me again in a few short weeks. He is spending Christmas in Virginia. Ten days. 10 long days. I am struggling. I keep trying to just tell myself that it is just another day. We can recreate it when he gets home. And, we will. But, I know the struggle that is approaching - or possibly the one that is already here. It is the everyday that I have difficulty getting through when Brayden is gone. I just got him back. I will only have 2 weekends with him and he will leave again. Then add Christmas to it... ugh. I lost Saturday for no reason at all, except I was already letting myself be miserable - and he hasn't even left me yet. I won't ever get that Saturday back.
I know the hard times - they come and they go. I am more familiar with the pattern then I care to be. But, that is life. I continue to reflect on all that we have been through in these few short years. I stay stuck in the tough times instead of rejoicing in the everyday that is perfectly normal. Perfectly wonderful. It is a pattern of behavior; Always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I need to stop that. I need to stop expecting people to let me down, waiting for them to prove me right. That's what I have learned. People will let me down. Those people, they will come and they will go. The good ones stay. They support me. They encourage me. Even if they sometimes disagree with me - we have an appreciation for each other's point of view, no matter how different. I have a few select friends that hold this definition and of course my family, and John. Brayden and I have been and will always be that to each other, just like my mom is to me.
Sunday morning came - sun shining. I took Mom's advise. I wanted our day together to be as beautiful as it was outside. Sunny and warm - completely beautiful. So we did - and it was just that beautiful.
We visited Santa at Pete's Train during the Holiday of Lights. We went to the Indian Creek Christmas Tree Farm to cut down our tree. It was 60 and sunny! This is my kind of winter! We went home and got to work on decorating. We even squeezed in some family portrait time :) I can't wait to share them!
From Sunday came Monday - and I was off work! :) Brayden and I had a wonderful day. Nothing special but just time together was really nice.
The tough times, they will come and they will go. The good ones, they last forever. Here is a glimpse of some the lasting ones :)
Pete's Train and Meeting Santa:
Cutting down the Christmas Tree:
In search of the perfect tree :)
Found it!
Sneak Peak of family pictures! (I may be biased, but seriously... could he be any cuter?)
So much to be happy for :)
Saturday was Kim's Birthday.
Image credit: Chris Bland
Kim is my Sister-in-Law, she is married to my brother Nate. I must admit, when they married each other, we would be hard pressed to find a better couple. Nathan is wonderful and funny and kind and sincere. He loves to cook and laugh. However, he is not known for his organizational skills. And, he often can get ahead of himself when taking on tasks. He likes to do everything. Kim puts the organization into Nathan's life. They have 4 children - 6 very busy schedules. Kim always has a smile on her face and she is great about homemade gifts and cards for every birthday and holiday - even baskets on May Day. She has the kids homemade art displayed all over the house and she has 4 very happy, busy kids. Their family is a well run machine. Nathan and Kim have a lot on their plate. But, they operate very smoothly. That isn't to say it is always easy, but they make it look like it is.
One of the traits I admire most about Kim is her knowledge and work for advocacy. Drew has special needs - so she has self taught her way through the special needs world. Not only for Drew, but for her all of her kids. In every facet of life, in her own and for her kids, she is certain to be the voice. She doesn't back down. And most importantly she asks questions. This may not seem like much. But, it is. Kim asks the right questions. She expects answers and rationale. She goes prepared and she stands her ground. She is always kind, but she means business. I don't know if she was like this prior to being a parent - but, I assume it was always in her. I admire her strength and determination.
God blesses our lives each differently. He gave Drew to Kim, and her to Drew. He gave Nathan; Kim, McKenna, and Drew and continued the blessings with Benson and Cole. They have a beautiful, happy little family.
Image Credit: Chris Bland
There is a story of a guy who claims to have had a crush on me since junior high. I, of course, love to hear him tell the story of the boy with a crush on the girl that thought he was too shy. We were talking about this last night. I have to admit, I get giggly like a school girl when he talks about the different times he noticed me, but he never approached me. And this story would have stayed this way if it hadn't been for church and his Mom, Denise.
Here is how the 'story of us' began:
I was making an effort to get into a routine of going to church on a regular basis. I needed it back into my life. I ran into Denise a few times at church. I always make a point to say hello. She has been a friend of Mom and Dad's forever. And, she is very likeable, kind, considerate. Approachable. So, I would. It has been like that since high school. I would acknowledge Denise way before I would acknowledge John... because he is shy and Denise is not. :)
So, this summer I saw her multiple times by coincidence, or so we think. And then came a Tuesday, late afternoon. I was coming out of my apartment juggling Brayden and a few presents for McKenna and Benson's Birthday Party. I heard my name called from the street. It was Denise. We had another coincidental meeting that became intentional. Denise was driving by and saw me. So, she pulled over and came up to Brayden and I. We had the usual chit chat, "Hi, how are you? How is work?, etc, etc." Then I could tell something was different. She was nervous. And, she was uncomfortable. That was not typical. Well, the next question that came out of her mouth was reason for her discomfort. She was asking for my number, for John.
So the story goes, as I am told by John, my name got brought up and Denise had mentioned that I wasn't dating anyone. So, John asked her to get my number. He thought maybe through a mutual friend, or my mom, or sister. But, instead Denise saw me, so on that Tuesday in the parking lot she got my number scribbled onto a torn bank deposit slip (it still hangs on the fridge at our house). She asked me if I was dating anyone or interested in dating. My response, "No, I am not dating anyone - and, I am not interested in dating any one. I am so busy with Brayden and all of my projects I don't have the time. " And frankly, I was exhausted with the efforts relationships take. They are work. And, I just didn't think I was any good at putting in the work they require. So, I told Denise, "We can be social. I know it is difficult meeting people out here. So, here is my number. Maybe we can hang out sometime. " I could tell Denise was happy to have the number and the uncomfortable situation over! I joke with John that had it been anyone one else but wonderful Denise, I wouldn't have given it out. I gave my number for her, because how could I say 'no' to kind and sweet Denise.
So, a few weeks later, we had our first date. I of course needed a whole new outfit. I straightened my hair. I even wore jewelry. We were going to grill out at his house. Casual, yet comfortable. I arrive all fancied up and he answers the door in shorts, t-shirt, and tennis shoes. My face turned red. 1. Because I was too dressy for this grilling session and 2. I had forgotten how cute he was.
From that date on, I realized that shy guy had a nack for conversation. We clicked and it worked. We have been inseparable ever since.
... all thanks to Denise :)
I got my boy back :)
Every trip Brayden takes to Virginia is painful. I am happy for him. Happy for the time he gets with his Dad and relatives in Virginia. For me, it is paralyzing. I feel very unlike myself. Edgy and cranky. I really find it hard to function. And, there is the constant reminder when people ask "where's Brayden?" And in that moment, my head hangs and everyone hears the same muffled response, "He is in Virginia." If it is his cousins that ask, I try to sound chipper and happy. But, sometimes, it is just hard to fake. I know John wants to help lift me from my funk. And, he tries. Sometimes successful. Sometimes not, at no fault of his.
BUT, on Monday he came back to me! :) And, in that exact instant when I scoop him up, I feel like me again, whole to have my other half. John immediately gets a picture of the two of us with the same text message "got my boy back". I always take the following day off work so he can have a transition day and we can have some quality one-on-one time together. We had such a wonderful day - completely ordinary - completely perfect. We watched cartoons and danced the 'hot dog dance'. We painted and snuggled. We started our Christmas decorating. Just Me and B.
We played with his pet geckos. They crawl up his arm and around his neck and he giggles. I love that giggle. We talked about their sticky claws that help them climb - up our arms, and up trees. So, that became his obsession for the day (and now I assume for everyday for the next month). He was a lizard with sticky claws. All I can do is laugh. He is so perfect. He always seems older. The time I miss he has already changed. It is a reminder to cherish him just as he is, the constant on the go, stubborn, goofy, giggly, helpful, loving, wild all boy that he is.
I tried to get some pictures of him. Not groomed. Just Brayden being Brayden. Stained cheeks and lips from ketchup and hotdogs. I beg for a still moment and a smile. "Say Cheese!" But, it isn't him. He can't sit still long enough. He is too busy roaring like a dinosaur, and crawling with his sticky claws.
Brayden's sticky claws
"Say Cheese!"
I am so thankful for his ketchup kisses and his sticky claws. He makes life normal, and perfect. :)
I love our extraordinary everyday life.
I did not forget. But, I did fall behind on my Birthday Blog post for my dear brother-in-law, Chris. He is no stranger to Life, Love & Lemons. His work has been displayed on here many times. Last Tuesday was his birthday.
Chris, is one of those 'Jack of all Trades' kind of guy. He really knows how to do a lot of stuff. And, it would be hard for me to even attempt to categorize, because he really does a lot. The most important, of course, is husband and father. And, I must say, he is pretty darn good at it too! Chris is always calm. He doesn't fluster easy, which I admire. He seems to know a little about everything, and a lot about a lot! Chris is just a likable guy, and is always there when one of us, or anyone, is in a pinch.
He makes his family his number 1 priority. Mallory and Chris have something very special, and they have made it last, even after being together for nearly a decade. Mallory and Chris have been very important to me and Brayden. We balanced crazy schedules together and helped one another out to save on daycare costs, and most importantly, having our kids be able to grow up together. Maxine and Brayden are like brother and sister they have spent so much time together. There are moments when they fight, but they are best friends. Much like Mallory and Chris are to me. :)
Happy Belated Birthday Chris! :) Thank you for all you do!!
It is that time of year when your mail will become flooded with updates and pictures of all of your loved ones. What a blessed time of year! Here are a few families I did over the past couple weeks... a few more for this weekend! :)
You still have time to book your Holiday Sessions! Contact me today! :)
We had a 2 day event for Brayden's 3rd Birthday. And, we had a blast!
We celebrated Brayden's and his cousin Mason's birthday by going to Bounce Town - which, of course, is a great way to let the littles be absolutely nuts and run around like maniacs! Aunt Mallory and Uncle Chris bought special dinosaur hats and masks - Brayden loved it! It was the start to a great weekend.
That night, B, John, and I did presents and cake. Every single gift was dinosaur related!
Saturday was the birthday bash! For me, it is a big deal - I don't do party planning very well... and, I defiantly do not cook, especially for a large group of people. But, I have to say, there were a lot of compliments - and the house was trashed, representative of 10 kids having a lot of fun :)
Especially, this big 3 year old!
Unfortunately, Sunday came and I had to send Brayden off to Virginia, again. I keep waiting for the time when it will get easier. But, I don't think it ever will. Today is day number 3 without him and I am still in my mopey phase. Alittle paralyzed not knowing what to do without him around. And, I do the typical torture - watch videos and cry - my whole heart aching. I typically revert to laying in bed. Dinner, in bed. Editing, in bed. TV, in bed. And, that is what I did last night. And, this morning, that is where I wanted to stay. In a few more days this phase will pass, and I will grow excited for his return. Cleaning, organizing, and waiting to see the truck pull up so I can kiss those perfect little lips again - the count down begins: 5 more days...
"Hello Baby! Who are you?" "Are you a monkey with clever toes? Perhaps your a porcupine, twitching its nose"
Hello Baby, a book by Mim Fox, I received as a gift from a former co-worker after Brayden was born. It's an adorable book, Brayden and I still read it on a weekly basis - we both have it memorized. We have lots of favorite books - and reading before bedtime is one of our oldest, and most favorite traditions. I have been reading to him since he was just a little guy. I would be feeding him and rocking him to sleep - while reading some of my favorites. These favorites were children books really written to make moms cry. A few that come to mind are, "Hold you a little longer" and "Mommies Best Kisses". I can barely get through the first page without tears streaming.
These beautifully written books make me think constantly about the little man that is growing up right in front of my eyes. They help me to acknowledge - and try to force me to accept - he will not stay this little. There will inevitably come a day when he will no longer snuggle with me and let me read stories to him. Or let me play with him in the tub, or need me to kiss away the boo-boos. Someday, I will be the embarrassing Mom that he doesn't want to be around. And, I will wait until that phase turns and he will come back to trust me as a parent and a friend. For now, Every night I will relish in our simplest and purest tradition - bath time. snuggle time. reading time. our time.
Here we are. Three years in the making.
Who are you, Brayden?
You come from 2 parents with very strong personalities. We are both very proud of who we are, where we come from, and the little man we are raising. Through everything, We love you.
You were born on November 16th, 2009 at 7:21 pm at Northside Atlanta Hospital after 12 hours of labor - all 8 pounds and 10 ounces of you! You had big dark eyes, dark hair, big hands and feet - my lips, your dad's ears. It was the most incredible moment in my life. I can still picture it as if it were yesterday. I will forever live with joy of that day. From that moment on, I was a new person, better - just because I was your mom. My life's meaning changed.
From that day, you have been developing your own self. You have traits from both your dad and I, gentle and kind - and, a little stubborn too. You are loving. You are smart. You are handsome. Your eyes and smile make me melt, daily. You never stop running. You love, love, love dinosaurs. You love sweets and would pass up a burger any day for a cookie (just like your mom). You love bath time, still - but, I have to beg to let me wash your hair. You love your family - all of them - with your whole heart, even though you are still working on how to share toys with your cousins. You have a strong presence where ever you go. You draw people to you like a magnet. Somedays, when you and I aren't seeing eye to eye - a strangers adoring gaze or kind comment about 'it goes too fast - love them little while you can' often helps me to step back and in fact, love you while you are little. I forget sometimes that you are still learning. Still growing. Still feeling out your boundaries. And, more lately - you have decided you enjoy pushing those boundaries - just to see how far you can get. I would say you are just a typical 3 year old - but, I also know you may have inherited those traits too... from which parent is actually hard to tell!
So Brayden, Here you are, on your 3rd Birthday. We have come along way in this short time. We have traveled many roads together, and there will be many more to come. Just know that no matter what, my hand, shoulder, ear, heart (and pocket book) is always here for what ever you may need.
I will love you.
I know through the years you will learn many life lessons. Some you will learn from those that love you most. You will follow our examples. And others, you will learn by doing - and, in the doing - things may not always come out as you envisioned in your mind. But, you will learn, much like I have, through living.
Always, always, always, reach higher and further then you can ever see. You can do anything. And if someone says you can't, work even harder, stronger, longer. Preserverance goes a long way. Be happy and light hearted. Life doesn't need to be so serious. Play - no matter how old you are, make time for fun. Stay focused. Work hard and love harder. Life pays off as long as you life it.
Be honest and faithful in all relationships, including the one with God. Give gratitude everyday, for everyday is a blessing.
You are my blessing - and everyday, especially on your birthday, I give thanks for you.
To our Little Man, Little Buddy, Little Hawk, Little Mister, Snickerdoodle, Snugglebug, Bubba, NeNe...
Brayden Scott Hawkins - Happy 3rd Birthday! We all love you!
