Brayden got home last night! :) The excitement and anticipation of knowing he was only miles away was exhausting. I kept calling and asking, "Where are you now?" "How much longer?" "How is he doing?" "Does he remember me?" - I am sure Mike wasn't annoyed at all! :)
But then it was time, I saw the truck pull up... I went running down the stairs and out the door like a track star! I scooped him up and kissed him a 1000 times! He looked at me in the eyes with a half delirious smile, and then gave me a big hug. It was great.
We did all of the normal stuff - dinner, play with bugs and talk about dinosaurs, take a bath and get ready for bed. But, last night I did everything with excitement. I wasn't too busy for any of it. It makes me sad for the days when I have been. He seemed bigger, and talked differently - like he was older. It is that daily progress of these little ones that you don't see through the daily grind. It made me sad but also thankful for this opportunity for clarity and appreciation.
As we were playing, Grammy had given him this candy dispenser / flashlight / compass (where do people think up these toys?) - Of course, he loved it! I was pointing out the compass on the bottom of this interesting toy. I said, "This is a compass. It helps you so you don't get lost. It shows you what direction you are going. And, if you get lost, It will help you find your way back." As the words were coming out of my mouth, I played with his hair and looked as beautiful excited eyes. I thought to myself, he is my compass. I live life in a different direction because of him. And, he keeps me from getting lost. Without him for these 9 days - I was without direction. And, my body could feel it. I was lost. Wandering around busy but never really knowing what to do. I was just fumbling around, not sure what to do next or which turn to take. The moment I picked him up - my body relaxed for the first time in 9 days. I was back on course and with direction. Back to life,... with my compass.